"No More Cranky Pants"
Kacie Starr Long

"Do everything without complaining and arguing." Philippians 2:14

With a big sigh, I heaved the final, heavy box of fabric onto the table. 

I was tired.

Frustrated.

Annoyed and stressed.

I had been working many days—back to back without a true Sabbath, and I was tired. I began to complain to my friend. I complained about how my car was full of odd and ends of remnant fabrics that had been donated and how I hadn't found a good home for them. I complained about how an open bottle of liquid coolant had accidentally leaked onto a jacket in my car trunk months ago. I went on and on for a bit, and finally, my friend told me: 

"Quit your whining."

I stopped in my tracks to process what she had just said.

"Quit your whining."

She didn't say the words viciously. She didn't say them dispassionately; she simply told me what I needed to hear at the moment.

As I reflect on this recent encounter, I am grateful for a friend who felt comfortable telling me the truth. This friend, who is also like a mentor to me, allowed God to speak through her. There are times in our lives when we need to vent, times when we need to exhale to a friend who is gentle, compassionate, and reassuring. There are also times when we need friendships that will tell us the truth—in a loving manner so we can really see (and hear) ourselves.

The truth is, I have been complaining- a lot.

Complaining about work.

Complaining about my finances.

Complaining about my feelings.

Lately, I have been a grumpy pants and have witnessed firsthand how complaining can open a door for the enemy to wreak havoc. I've seen my complaints morph into stagnancy, complacency, heaviness, oppression, and even a bit of depression.

I know it's the holiday season, and it's a time for everyone to be merry, but maybe, like me, you need a friend to lovingly and directly speak God's truth to you:

Change your thoughts.

Change your words.

It's not easy. Sometimes, it can be really hard to change how we think, especially, when our feelings of stress, agitation, and holiday blues are so loud, but we must focus on the truth that:



God is with you, and God is with me.

God is with us, and that is worthy of praise. 

Our feelings are just what they are—feelings.

God gave us feelings as human beings, but our feelings don't have to control us.

While you may feel stressed, agitated, or frustrated about things that are happening (or aren't happening) in life, are there areas where GOOD is happening in your life that you can focus on?

Recently, I began to list ten things for which I am grateful before I get out of bed. Every morning, I search my mind for ten things for which to express gratitude to God. Sometimes they are things like my health, my husband, my mother, a relationship with God, a warm bed to sleep in... literally anything I can think of. In all, I give God praise. The consequence of this daily action has helped tremendously to focus on God’s goodness and grace.

Whenever I find negative thoughts creeping into my mind and attempting to exit through my mouth, I have learned to convert them to a prayer request rather than whining. 

It takes a form like this:  "God, things are really tough right now. I am frustrated because this situation seems like it just won't change. Can you please give me your perspective as I go through this challenge? Help me to remember your truth—that you are with me and you will never leave me. That you will use this hard situation for my good."

Truthfully, complaining and whining have never been known to help a situation. It might feel good temporarily to the flesh to unleash a verbal tirade, but as believers, we know that we eat the fruit of our words (Proverbs 18:21). Why would I want to eat a bunch of nasty, negative, nary-filled words and thoughts?

I also know that it doesn't help to suppress my thoughts or ignore my true feelings. When I am feeling upset, discouraged, or defeated, I need a healthy outlet to process my thoughts and feelings. Hence, I am sure to share my feelings with God, a therapist, or safe friends. Also, I find myself engaging in some helpful exercises like journaling or taking a "walk and talk." I go out for a walk and talk things out with God or a friend. My experience has always been wonderful.

I share this because I think it's important to know that while God doesn't want us to grumble and complain, He also wants us to allow Him into the tough places in our lives. We don't have to pretend that we aren't aggravated, stressed, or frustrated. The purpose of this script is to encourage you (and myself) that when we feel this way, we should focus on key areas where God is working IN our lives and the GOOD that is happening to us.  Also, when we feel like whining is the only solution, we should endeavor to be honest and real with God by expressing our thoughts to Him in a manner that allows Him to bring peace, comfort, and resolution to us.

About the Author

Kacie Starr Long Is an author and speaker who loves to use her voice to direct people to Jesus. When she’s not writing, she is either working out at Orange Theory Fitness or sewing. She’s in the recovery process from compulsive overeating and has outstandingly positive results to show. She also runs a thriving sewing ministry called the Sew Hope Community Sewing Room. She is most proud to be the wife of Alfred T. Long, Sr., and together, they lead a non-profit that positively impacts and serves prisoners and their families. Connect with her at Kacie@SewHopeSTL.com and via her YouTube page for Christian teachings and encouragement. 

Remain Blessed.